poorchoices.net

i posted this in some forums that i visit, in response to a thread on hope. an earlier post of mine and the rest of the thread arent here, but i think you get the idea. just wanted to share. and im not zaffy, i was referencing his previous post talking about how humanity dosent give him hope.

[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] zaffy_2005
[/quote]

i agree. i dont know anyone that make me think better of humanity (even the best of people fall terribly short of being perfect). and i know that i myself have caused far more harm than good, even in doing what i feel was right (at the time). i have seen the best i have to help people hurt them instead.

but i have hope. i know that He uses all actions for His good, and i have seen terrible things turn right in ways that can’t be explained otherwise. i have a hope that there is someone[a wholly inadequate pronoun] that is more than a shadowy mass of existential nonsense. i have a hope that He lives.

i hope this dosent offend you. that was not my intention.

So, the weather was pretty great this morning. Nice and cool, but not too cold. It was nice while I was walking up the 109 steps between my appartment and the student union. I wish it had been that way when I came up the six flints of stairs to my first class. The third floor kind of sucks. Also, this one is kind of strange. I have this class everyday, and no one sits in the same place twice. Strange.

so, the word of the semester is ‘brutal’.
german 120 is going to he hard. i already feel lost.
my Physical Science class is going to be one of the evolution kind.
on tuesdays and thursdays, i have class for 4 1/2 hours straight (the last 3 1./2 are in the same room, also).  it was the only way to get my schedule free for working on hangs and focuses with the lighting dept.
on top of all that, at my work study, im going to start off trying to work 17 hours per week. not really hard for me (i spend most of my time doing my own thing anyway) but its going to be hard, since one by one my chat buddies have left me alone (i guess i did that to them plenty of times, but still, not having chat people kind of sucks.  the other chat i go to seems to be going downhill some.
all this and moving back up here so suddenly after being back in the land of the living has kind of taken its toll on me.
i have been gaming more than usual (team fortress 2, on pc. i got a copy of it for christmas, and started playing recently.)
i kind of feel like one of the prophets. my online devos have me reading about isreal’s more disobedient times, so that is pretty depressing also.
in either case, this is going to be a tough one.
im not sure im going to be home before spring break. thats quite a while to be here in the wastes (11 weeks less 2 days).
one bit of good news, finals will be done be the 6th of may, so thats pretty early.
a quick end to my brutal grind would be appreciated.
poorch, out.

by the way that last post is my updated bio for xbox live.
several things have my upset right now and im kind of doing random, stupid things everywhere.
sorry for the confusion.

what are the people you see here, if not some random chunk of text? how do you truly know someone? how do you (or i) know that i am a good person? what what is it that makes you want to know me? what is the driving force in our relationships, and how do we further them?

this news is a little late, but the catfish also dies during my turkey day break. i left all my aquarium junk in joplin. it seems to me like admitting defeat, but i didnt really know what else to do. lugging all that junk around it difficult at best, and id have to do it again in under a month.

so, i havent updated in a while.
after righting the ph in my tank, i returned to the pet shop and re-populated with another convict cichlid and a spotted raphael catfish. i decided to bring the two with me on my return to the not-so-wasteland in the south. now four days after my trip, (and after looking like he had recovered from the stress of the trip), my convict up and died. i dont have any idea why; the catfish is alright.
i think my luck with small aquatic creatures left with my old friend, carpaccuio.

so as it turns out, the ph level in my tank crashed (for some unknown reason). my new little friend had to go back to the pet store for his own well being. we will see what i can get to replace him in a week or two when i get the various levels in check.

so, here is the update on fish.

i had added some guppies to my tank (sorry, no pics) in effort to make it a happier place for the little guys, and much to my shagrin, they had all killed each other over the course of the next week (the last of them died this morning). so, in an effort to keep on keeping on, i now have this little guy (sorry for the fuzzy pic).  he is on of these.